Posted by: Junker | 30 May , 2011

Impossible Choices

I can’t keep still. I keep stirring that I have to get up from the couch I’m sitting on to turn the computer on and write.

I have never been this troubled. I’m sure it’s not an effect of the supplement I’m taking. This is something else. I’d like to express something. My mind says don’t but my heart is telling me otherwise. It is telling me to pour it out, but where? How? To whom?

I never thought I’d still find someone significant but can never be completely mine. On the surface I know very well what to do, but there is an undercurrent of chaos trying to loose itself from my grip. I am struggling against my self.

I am searching for ways to escape. But, the ways I found seems just poor excuses to keep it temporarily off me. I know, it sticks to me like my own scent. I can’t shake it off.

The inner tug-of-war is ripping me in two. Why is this thing has to happen?

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